Day Tripping: Cheltenham Town V Southend

Simon Barnes, respected sports scribe at the Times, regards the England rugby team, after their magnificent win in Paris following two poor second half shows in London and Rome, as a bit of a tease.

'This side (England) have become the ultimate sporting tease.  They lead you on and then they let you down, they let you down and then suddenly they are all over you again.  They seem to draw strength from their own capriciousness.  It is not one of those loves that has its being in equality or reliability or solidity.'

Sorry Simon.  The rugger boys are dirty filthy tarts compared to Southend United, they're the girl at school who rubbed your thigh and gave you a massive stiffy then ran out the room screaming, "I'm not touching that horrible thing".  (What, only me?)

This is the team that ran Leeds off the park, a team 30 seconds from beating the Borient at Birdbrain Road, a team that won it's last game 3-0 many miles from home, a team that 48 hours ago I spent 72 quid to follow them to Crewe, Carlisle and Liverpool and back, a team that I'm returning from much needed R&R in Morocco a day early so I don't miss the next home game, a team that follows this all up with a performance of Millwall type horror.  

Oh well, at least we got a point this time.  11 points are three less than I wanted from February but it sets it up for March and a massive match at home to Luton next week.  The play offs are still on, somehow!

I was in Cheltenham at four after a three hour coach trip from Victoria on one of my legendary one pound funfares but sadly it was diet cokes in the local Weatherspoons with the daughter as the no drinking/nul points weight watchers con had till Sunday to go and where they had several delicious ales on tap to make me suffer further.  72 very long hours to go! 

Got to the ground early to see the team warming up and impressed by the new away end stand with only a fifth of what would end up a 600-odd strong Blue support.  In their version of the East Stand there were 40 plus teenagers, a couple with Chelsea shirts on bizarrely, who screeched their support throughout the game, even after the equaliser.  Annoying that they were it's support the Blue Voice could learn from, especially away, as it went very quiet in the second half with the team playing poorly and needing to know we were there with them.  (This week's classic, "change it now Tilson or resign".  Class.)

The game started similar to the debacle at the Den as Cheltenham didn't get out of their half in the first five minutes finishing off with a Mulgrew free-kick that I thought had crept in before a good save from Robins keeper Higgs brought a corner.  Though finding ourselves in some fine shooting positions, this time we failed to get the opening goal.  In fact Cheltenham looked worse than Millwall, we ended up winning several corners in the first half where they had none, sadly most were rubbish.  Then, on 25 minutes, we made the obligatory error in defence and unlike last week at Yeovil when we got away with it they had two in-form strikers in Gillespie and Brooker, (see preview), who combined to see the latter tap in from a yard out.   Of course it should have been stopped, Clarkey falling over yet again, who makes his studs, and Adam not finding the correct challange, but credit to Gillespie, once in the area there was a penalty waiting if he'd gone over, but Darryl decided to stay at his near post and then Victor had a glorious chance to clear after he had got in the perfect position on the line, but also slipped allowing Brooker to score his third in three.

After that the half was seen out with Blues seeming unable to try the simple short ball on the ground, the conditions were screaming out for these tactics, mixing long balls down the wing for the wingers to chase, or the centre for poor Barnard to try and win in the air, he was fouling a lot though, while Walker has a dodgy first touch, with tougher balls through the middle of the park which were picked out with ease by a Cheltenham midfield who couldn't believe they were playing a top six side.  Don't worry Tilly will have a word at half time.  Blimey, it must have been the guy who talked to the England lads at Twickenham and in the Eternal City, they came out even worse!

It was poor, maybe the wind was worse than I thought it was from the safety of the stand, but several Darryl kicks or Francis passes ended up in row Z, while Marky and Black struggled, changing wings to little effect.  Mac had one of his worst games for the club as well as another unnecessary booking.  We just couldn't get going.  Cheltenham, on the other hand, got the rest of the home ground going with a display of effort and skill that they haven't showed for a month.  A neutral would have wondered who the team was challenging for the play offs. 

It was getting to the stage where you started to think you'd take a point when on 74 minutes, after the first serious Blues pressure since the opening quarter, a desperate half clearance found the gem that is Nick Bailey, who passed the ball into the net from around the penalty spot and off the inside of the keepers left hand post.

Still the passing went astray, however, we could have mugged the points when in the last minute of the allotted three minutes injury time, we were awarded a free-kick 30 yards out.  Mulgrew again shaped up for a shot al la Hartlepool but this time found Mac on the left who hit a low hard pass that evaded all the Blue shirts by inches.  When Clarkey turned to get the ball back in the six yard box a winner still looked on but the ref blew for full time.  If only a certain ref in East London had been so efficient!

A feeling of a point won as I heard some excellent blues music from a pub called The Cotswold near the high street.  Very welcome it was too for an hour as I sat in the corner with my frigging diet coke as several pints of one of my faves, Wandsworths Bishops Tipple, were being served.

Walking to my daughters smart art deco restaurant, The Daffodil, where she was finishing a long shift as the assistant bar manager, good to know what a media degree and several thousand pounds in student loans gets you nowadays but at least she's working, a lot aren't, through a Cheltenham Friday night high street.  (Not wanting to be a London snob but that's quite a surreal thing when your cold stone sober.)  There, with bottles of Grahams vintage port at my mercy, my suffering was completed by more endless cups of caffeine to wait for her to clear up.  Oh come Sunday afternoon and that swimming pool bar is going to get a hammering, as long as Easy Jet get me there in one piece!

Another pounder back to Victoria at 5.25am waited after walking through a hurricane which was now mixed with rain as I wondered if I was in for a long two months.  Transport for Huddersfield and Swindon already arranged along with the April bookings meant I was in for every one of the last 12 matches.

Which Southend was going to turn up as my date for the May prom, final date to be confirmed?  The one whose going to slap me around the face screaming for her Mum or the one whose going to give me a real good seeing too behind the bike sheds?  With this team, who knows!  

Flahavan - 6;  As with all the games since his return, not much to do mixed with some awful distribution.  Seems more nervous regarding quick throw outs than he used too.  A couple of hopeful Cheltenham punts that dipped suddenly got him going backwards and us worried.  Did make a signature good low save in the second half.

Francis - 5;  No I'm not the chairman of the Lewis Hunt fan club but even the most loyal Francis supporters must have been biting their tongues with this performance.  For every good run there were several misplaced passes gifted to the opposition or found there way into the stand.  The 'he's a better going forward than Lewis' argument is wearing thin.  I don't expect Tilly to change but I believe Lewis has been shabbily treated.

Clarke - 5;  Not his best game, through himself at every thing but found an immovable object in Brooker too much for him at times, losing out to him in the air on several occasions while his passing was as bad as several of his team-mates. 

Barrett - 6;  Oh what do you want me to say about Captain Adam?  Committed to the Blues, yes.  Gives 110%, yes.  Tackling like a terrier, yes.  Commanding with partner Clarke, no.  

Mulgrew - 6;  Frustrating.  As good as Hammell with his left peg on occasions, he even made a sublime pass in the first half with his right.  Also weighed in with some wonderful tackles breaking down many Robins attacks down the right flank.  Then, just as quickly, he's nowhere to be seen, gives the ball away or falls over when he should be defending.

Black - 4;  Have we had 'his' game against Hartlepool a few weeks back.  I remember one good run in first 45.  Had to ask if he was still out there half way through the second half.  Tilly agreed, subbing him for Harry, not the greatest of compliments.

Bailey - 8;  The usual Nicky show with more energy than I've seen for a while, throwing in a superb equaliser for good measure.  Can equal his colleagues in the poor passing department at times but no credit card crunch for him, he's built up enough to last into next season and beyond.

MaCormack - 5;  And we needed Nicky to be at the races as Mac certainly was not.  Took his frustration out on some unlucky Cheltenham sap in the second half as his game was on the verge of falling apart.  Hopefully, a blip.

Gower - 6;  Continued his poor form with another shocker which many believed he had have left behind after Yeovil.   Gets an extra point for at least looking for the ball but Marky certainly cannot blame the weather.  You even thought longingly about the not always brilliant Maher corners after some horrible efforts, though Adam maybe should have done better from one of them.  Should learn not to respond to the traditional "F off Gower, you lazy F'er" which will continue to come his way, however unfairly and wrong, while he continues to be one of Tilly's untouchables in this form.

Barnard - 6;  The service was so rubbish at times your heart went out for the poor lad.  Gave his all but must cut out the needless fouling and keep on the right side of the linesman's flag.  There is a line that Lee must find between being a central defenders pain in the ass and giving your opponents several free kicks close to the half way line.  I'm confident he will.  There are more goals to come from this boy.

Walker - 6;  First time I'd seen him in a full 90 minutes and the promise is there.  Certainly looks lively but his first touch can place the ball away from him and nearer his markers while he needs to show more confidence when in a good shooting position.  Lets make a more informed judgement after the next tough set of fixtures.

Subs:  Harrold - 5;  Good to see him looking so fit after his tour of Afghanistan.  Tilly decided to play Walker out on the wing to replace the hapless Black while giving Lee some much needed help in the middle against the uncompromising and not very pretty Cheltenham central duo.  Sadly didn't work. 

Officials - 5;  Seen worse refs but the linesman on our left flank